As the sun sets, I lift my eyes to the sky and see your handiwork again. The hint of rain, the movement of the clouds, the colors changing from subtle to brilliant and back to subtle again until they slowly fade into the darkness of night. The world your hands have made speaks of the fathomless creative depths of your mind. The artist looks at the sky and sees an ever-changing work of art, every moment new colors layered upon the canvas... The scientist names the formations of clouds and studies them to know their meanings, finds patterns in the stars and formulates a map of the sky... Both look up and see something different, but, are the two really so different? You have brought fulfillment to both, made both gaze in wonder, gave both something to dream about, ponder, and inspire their own creativity and passions.
We were made in your image. Is it not natural, then, that we would struggle to control our innate "god" complexes. We want to be the masters of our worlds, just as you are the master of yours. The gardener puts his seeds in the ground and carefully tends to them; feeds them, waters them, wills them to grow...he is the god of his garden! With a temperament akin to a mythological goddess, the homemaker reigns over her domain, striking fear into the hearts of any who dare challenge her domestic requirements, for she alone is ruler of her abode! How quickly we each become small gods and goddesses, fighting to control our tiny environments and struggling to make something for which we can name ourselves "CREATOR"; desperate to prove our power and sovereignty in this universe... Desperate to prove it to ourselves and everyone around us, but especially wanting to prove to you somehow that we don't need you. Being made in the image of God, everything within us wants to BE God, or at least what our finite human minds think of as "God"...bossy, judgmental, controlling, arrogant, supreme, dominating, authoritative, strong, powerful, worthy of worship, obeyed without question, and exalted above all others. Heaven forbid we actually bow down and surrender to the lordship of anyone else, least of all, to a supposed "supreme being" who is nothing like we believe a "God" should be. You have blown our minds, broken all our rules, and bled your life away just to prove your love to us. 'Tis not god-like at all!
The bigness of this universe of which we keep discovering more speaks of a God who is more vast and complex than we could ever understand, which is frustrating for us because we want to understand everything. The creatures we continue to discover in the depths of the oceans speak of a God with a store of creativity no one human could ever attain, which is madness because our arrogance screams that we must be the best at something! Instead of seeing your creation around us and trying to explain you away somehow, why can't we simply acknowledge your existence and begin to search for clues in your creation as to who you are and how you want to relate to us, if at all?...
Who can not look at an ape, for instance, and chuckle at your obvious sense of humor? Who can not laugh out loud and almost blush with embarrassment when viewing a baboon's back side? While some may try to logically explain the male peacock's plumage, others of us ladies get a good snicker watching him prance around showing off his goods, all the while knowing we are the ones who do the hard part in bearing the young! Joy, laughter, smiles...these are a part of who you are...
Who can study the complexity of the human body and not wonder at your brilliance? To experience childbirth and not acknowledge it as a massive spiritual encounter is simply dishonest. To study science and know the perfect balance in the universe which allows life to exist on Planet Earth but refuse to believe someone much greater than ourselves put it there and keeps it there is like not seeing the forest for the trees. Wisdom, knowledge, intelligence...these are a part of who you are...
Why do we fight it? Why can't we see you for who you are instead of being threatened by you? All you have done, all you have made, all you continue to do speaks of your love for us. You want us to laugh, to enjoy what you have given us, to revel in the beauty you have made... You want us to be inspired by your works and discover our own passions. You want us to look in wonder and amazement at what you have done and understand we have a place to fill and something to contribute.
As the thunder rolls and lightning sends electric branches across the sky tonight, I know I could never truly understand you, but that is okay. You show me the things about you that I need to see, you reveal yourself to me in ways my mind can understand and my heart can embrace, and I am at peace in surrender to you.
c2009 Lorenda Houston
